Originally posted on http://digitaldiatribes.wordpress.com on February 20, 2007.
This last Saturday evening I had the distinct honor and privelege of having presided over what could only be described as an unmitigated disaster from a technical standpoint. But before I get into that, allow me to take this opportunity and provide a glimpse of my personal history for all my loyal fans (you know who you are, you two).
Back in the days when I had some hair and didn’t huff and puff after climbing one flight of stairs – those dandy high school and college days – I was in a rock band. Not just any rock band, mind you. I mean, we were gonna make it big! As an investment in my future, I purchased some Yamaha speakers that were the size of a small oven, and weighed approximately eight tons, and we collectively purchased a power amp. The sound wasn’t all that great, but that hardly mattered, because they were loud. And loud is what matters when playing rock and roll (that is more important, in fact, than playing correct notes).
Well, I also collected a lot of music. To feed my hunger for more and more music, I started using this little system to DJ. It was a perfect scheme. DJ a gig, get paid, go buy a bunch of music so I can DJ more gigs, etc. I basically netted zero, but the music was not looked at as an expense in my eyes. It was gold (I admit to harboring an irrational attachment to my music collection). Eventually, life forced my to cease and desist DJing, but I held on to my system. And it may be apparent to those paying close attention that our rock band never hit the big time. For the last few years, my speakers and amp collected dust.
Fast forward to a month or so ago, when my wife came home and told me she volunteered me to DJ a Father-Daughter dance for the homeschoolers. Now, this is funny in and of itself. A bunch of Moms thought it would be great to have Dads and Daughters share an evening of dancing together. And I’m not disagreeing that it’s a nice thought. But I don’t think the Moms understand the genetic coding of the typical American male. Through the grapevine, I heard some of the conversations the guys had with their wives. “I don’t know if I want to go there and sit around and talk to a bunch of guys I don’t know that well.” (To which I responded, “I thought the idea was to spend time with your daughter.”) Another comment was “Do I need to talk to people?” Ah, yes. Clearly, us men have an issue with the whole communication thing. The funny thing is, when we’re all together, there really isn’t a problem. It’s the whole leading up to the date and thinking about needing to say something to somebody that leaves many of us in a cold sweat. Not to digress too much, but that’s why men consider watching a game in silence with other guys a pleasant evening, while women look at us and think that we’re being unsociable.
Well, in the end it was realized that there was some resistance to this whole Dads-only idea, and in addition a few guys had a men’s retreat that weekend. So, it became a family affair (which turned out to be a great decision).
Now, for those of you who don’t DJ, it may seem as simple as just playing some music. And a DJ today purchases equipment to make life a lot easier than the old days. A good system today could be run from data files on a couple hard drives and CDs would be ripped to files. But since I don’t do this for a living, and haven’t done it for a long time, and since this was a volunteer activity, I had to go old-school. My 25+ year old P.A. system was to be used with a CD player and a tape deck. Two days of pulling and sorting and setting music (and listening to lyrics to make sure all songs were appropriate) would be done. It is not simple, and it is very time consuming to prepare all the music – especially when you haven’t gone through your collection. I cannot tell you the blessing that the database was that I posted about a few days ago! Check that post out to see what I’m talking about. (http://personaldiatribes.wordpress.com/2008/11/12/the-music-database-none-of-you-care-about/)
But then, the events which would cause much angst and heartache ensued. My CD player froze the afternoon of the dance. It would not play anything. This forced me to go to Best Buy two hours before the dance started in order to buy a new one. I was hoping for a simple, one-CD, bare bones component. Apparently these simple items are not even worth stocking these days, because the cheapest and simplest version was a 5-CD changer, that just isn’t all that great for DJ purposes. And it cost me twice what I wanted to spend, but I was kind of stuck, so I took it.
I arrived, and set up the equipment. On the test run, I noticed that the music sounded “tinny.” The woofer in one speaker was not working. The other speaker was distorted because it was compensating for the other. I was forced to go to one speaker. OK, it’s a homeschool crowd, not huge… we’ll live with it. Or so I thought.
As testing continued, suddenly the music cut out. After multiple tests and different cords and switching outputs and inputs, I realized that the problem was inside the amp. There must be a short or something. But the show must go on. I announced that there may be some occasional outages, and please bear with me. Meanwhile, I’m getting upset that all my equipment seems to be dying a slow and painful death.
Soon after that, however, every song was cutting out. It was terrible. Nobody could finish a dance. It was so bad that I finally had to bring out my boom box and use that. People were dancing around a stupid boom box, struggling to hear the music. It doesn’t get much better than that.
Oh, but it doesn’t end there. Supernatural forces were clearly at work on this night, because when I tried to play a tape in the boom box, it ate the tape. I was now relegated to playing music on a boom box using only the CD player. It was an absolute disaster of a night. It couldn’t get any worse.
Except for one strange thing… while it may have been a system and technical disaster, it wasn’t a disaster of a night at all.
God bless these fine homeschoolers. Had all these things happened with most groups – yes, even as a volunteer – I am sure there would have been disappointment or even anger. After all, this was to be a special night. Everyone dressed up, the gym was decorated, people had set aside the night on their calendars, and it would have been easy to let all these mishaps bring the mood down. (I must confess, I am a perfectionist when it comes to music – and my wife will vouch that it’s the ONLY area where I am a perfectionist – and I was angry and frustrated throughout the night)
These wonderful people not only continued to dance and have a good time, whether it was music from the P.A. or from a simple boom box, but they even made me have a good time despite everything that was going wrong. Instead of complaining about my failed equipment, they thanked me profusely for the effort and for providing the music. With this crowd, the glass was seven-eighths full instead of two-thirds empty.
I can only speak regarding our homeschool group, but I have been in a number of social circles, and I can tell you that these are special people. These are Catholic homeschoolers (and I should not fail to mention other wonderful friends who are not homeschoolers that had the invitation extended to them as well) and they are teaching their kids the faith, scholastics, and providing a daily example of how to live as a child of God on a daily basis. They are an inspiration, and I value their friendships.
They put me in such good spirits that when my tape-case zipper broke at the end of the evening as I was putting my equipment away, I was forced to laugh. It was a fitting end to a memorable night.
To any and all of you who were there, a big Shout Out from me to you. We are motivated by your example in our own homeschooling and child-rearing efforts. And to those others out there who are also homeschooling and trying to live and grow in your faith, bless you in your efforts! And to those who are not homeschooling, but find it important to raise children in a way that is contrary to a culture that says it’s all about self, then God bless you as well, and may you be successful in battling all these influences around us.
As a final note, this evening brought the end of an era. The speakers and amp have been permanently relieved of their duties. I donated them to a local music store in town. I feel like I just donated a kidney, but that soon shall pass. At least that’s what my therapist says.
For more information on our trials and tribulations as homeschool parents, check out my wife’s blog at www.thebluehouse.wordpress.com. You can also see our wonderful family at that site: http://thebluehouse.wordpress.com/our-family/.
